Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Clearly, lemurs have zero personality

>>ANIMALS IN THE NEWS WEEK<<
I don't know about you people, but it is incredibly easy for me to tell the difference between my mother and a teddy bear. This lemur, however, cannot seem to figure out that this is not his mother. Hasn't the lemur figured out that the teddy bear hasn't moved in, like, ever? Conclusion: hanging out with a lemur is like hanging out with a stuffed animal.

The other alternative, of course, is that this lemur is a fucking idiot. The mother realized this at some point, and while her dumbass kid was sleeping one night, she quietly slipped out of the baby lemur's arms and replaced herself with a teddy bear so she could go start a new, better family. I actually hope this is true, and that lemurs in general aren't totally lame, because I expect this sort of thing from hedgehogs (boo-ring), but lemurs really ought to know better.
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48 comments:

  1. yellaphantFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:30 AM

    Oh my god it's little fingers are clawing into my soul.

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  2. WalterFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:33 AM

    Lemur, what if th eanimals that want to eat you learn that you're dumb enough to think stuffed animals are your mom? They'll have a sure fire trap, and we'll all walk around the jungle tripping over stuffed animals.

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  3. Jessica MooneyFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:35 AM

    Do lemurs REALLY know better? I don't think so. I mean, look at those soul-less eyes! It's just plain creepy and totally wrong on so many levels. You'll find no sympathy here for lemurs OR hedgehogs. Ever.

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  4. UnknownFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:35 AM

    Seriously, look at those fingers! They look like the fingers of the grim reaper!!! Stay the fuck away from me Mr. Death!

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  5. The Cheap-Arse Film CriticFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:47 AM

    I like how the Teddy Bear looks strangely disturbed and violated by the whole thing...

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  6. AnonymousFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:48 AM

    Hey that is the awesomely tiny cute baby lemur Tahina that was also on Holy Cuteness.

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  7. SteveFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:54 AM

    stupid f****ng lemur! I may have died a little inside

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  8. ColleenFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:01 AM

    Hilarious from start to finish!

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  9. Baking and MistakingFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:14 AM

    Hey!
    My mom did that to me, too.
    One day, it was hey mom, whats up.
    The next it was, whoah mom, you look kind of...stuffed.

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  10. UnknownFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:37 AM

    It's all a ruse...you get closer to it to "oooo" and "awwww", and then it uses those friggin' alien fingers to poke out your eyes, reaching in through you eye sockets to feast upon your delicious brains.

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  11. DHFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:40 AM

    Now what would be cool if that was a real grizzly playing a stuffed bear...then he comes to life...and the next thing you know, appetizer a'la lemur!

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  12. wombatFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:59 AM

    You have hit the mark today, penguin. I have known some lemurs personally and it is exactly correct that they have the brains of a stuffed animal. But you wouldn't believe the shit they get away with anyway because they are SO FREAKING CUTE.

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  13. get in hereFebruary 10, 2009 at 8:07 AM

    Your mother looks like a bear.

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  14. M@February 10, 2009 at 8:13 AM

    I've read that chimpanzees have photographic memories.

    Fuck THEM, too.

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  15. Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin)February 10, 2009 at 8:16 AM

    that bear is creeping me out. , ,

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  16. Janine / Being BrazenFebruary 10, 2009 at 8:40 AM

    Oh my goodness I am having a cuteness overload here....I cant stop looking at the cute lemur...

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  17. SJOFebruary 10, 2009 at 8:41 AM

    Yo mama shits in da woods!

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  18. MameFebruary 10, 2009 at 8:44 AM

    Googly eyed freaks.

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  19. Melody!February 10, 2009 at 8:58 AM

    It is very and more than likely evident, that that there lemur would give me a very good backscratching! I must look into getting one of these things! I will put this lemur thing on my back and me and this lemur will walk in the woods with fully bellies at sundown!

    I will look into doing these things!

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  20. JediJeffFebruary 10, 2009 at 10:31 AM

    Wait until he tries to nurse that stuffed bear.

    Rude awakening.

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  21. UnknownFebruary 10, 2009 at 10:31 AM

    The bear looks like it's a little surprised cuz the lemur just tweaked its nipple.

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  22. dreXeLFebruary 10, 2009 at 11:42 AM

    i hug my giant plushy cow and i know she's not my mom.

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  23. skwilliFebruary 10, 2009 at 11:42 AM

    Lemurs are almost a monkey!

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  24. ReedFebruary 10, 2009 at 11:56 AM

    Idiot lemurs need love, too!

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  25. ghersionmyjerseyFebruary 10, 2009 at 12:07 PM

    awesome.

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  26. Ms MartyrFebruary 10, 2009 at 12:34 PM

    Wait a darn minute. I thought lemurs liked to "Move It, Move It"

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  27. Will NiccollsFebruary 10, 2009 at 1:42 PM

    That's not a lemur, that's the offspring of gollum and the stuffed animal for chrissakes.

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  28. Barry NewsdeskFebruary 10, 2009 at 1:56 PM

    I am consistently outraged by your posts. Well done.

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  29. mrbarringtonFebruary 10, 2009 at 2:30 PM

    That poor lemur. He's having an identity crisis. Doesn't that get him anything?

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  30. get in hereFebruary 10, 2009 at 3:10 PM

    Hedgehogs aren't boring, they are self-centred little fuck nuggets.

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  31. Steph(anie)February 10, 2009 at 3:49 PM

    It's time someone tells YOU what's what. Leave that adorable fucking lemur alone and pick on someone your own size. Yeah, I said it, what are you going to do about it?

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  32. morbidlylilaFebruary 10, 2009 at 3:51 PM

    Just to be fair.... I say..... fuck the bear too! REALLY! Does he think he's so cute too! WTF!

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  33. AnonymousFebruary 10, 2009 at 5:29 PM

    ....the eyes....

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  34. DKG aka Scrappy DooFebruary 10, 2009 at 5:40 PM

    Just what are you looking @ Lemur?

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  35. AnonymousFebruary 10, 2009 at 6:58 PM

    Oh god. It's got me. It really has. Some of your other pictures, I could live with. But THIS?!? THIS!!!???

    Oh god. My heart is melting. I caught myself doing that little 'awwwww...' smile in spite of myself. Damn.

    Great blog btw. =]

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  36. kristineFebruary 10, 2009 at 7:47 PM

    Um, that's not a teddy bear. That's a teddy LEMUR. Duh.

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  37. GreatSheElephantFebruary 11, 2009 at 2:10 AM

    damn, how did I never realise before? This explains so much about my childhood

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  38. Lee BemroseFebruary 11, 2009 at 4:37 AM

    Baby zombie. Easier to pronounce than "lemur."

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  39. Kennedy SmithFebruary 11, 2009 at 8:10 AM

    Hey, not all lemurs are totally lame: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epJTvIlk4hM

    Though this one humps gumball machines. Also, he "doesn't panel well," limiting his talk-show viability.

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  40. Christine February 11, 2009 at 5:00 PM

    Not the mama!

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  41. LauraFebruary 11, 2009 at 5:45 PM

    You, sir, have clearly never had one of them jump on your head before because he's trying to be friendly.

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  42. JamieFebruary 12, 2009 at 8:07 PM

    oh my god stop it. please please please stop it. please please please please please stop.

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  43. JKennyFebruary 16, 2009 at 6:45 PM

    Not only does that pipsqueak have the brains of a dehydrated pea, but the sick little incestuous fuck is trying to cop a feel on his own mother (or so the dipshit thinks)! Yuuck! I think I'm gong to throw up the spaghetti i had for dinner...

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  44. AnonymousFebruary 25, 2009 at 3:24 PM

    Holy crap, I can't stop laughing. Good stuff.

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  45. UnknownFebruary 27, 2009 at 10:50 AM

    the other youtube video of supposedly cool lemurs mentioned by Kennedy has been yanked but while investigating it, i saw this. The millipedes who suffer daily at the hands of these crack whore lemurs are the real victims and they need a support group or a facebook page or something. i don't even know what to say about the monkeys.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HN46PjBbns0

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  46. AnonymousMarch 21, 2009 at 7:54 AM

    Lay off the baby lemur, jeez! Just because his mom left him and he's trying to hold on to something soft for comfort doesn't mean he's stupid! HE'S ADORABLE!!!!!!!!

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  47. Ann SterzingerMay 22, 2010 at 6:10 PM

    awwwwwwwwwwwwww my brain just ran away and joined the pet store...

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  48. The WangOctober 24, 2010 at 10:26 PM

    Oh, thank you Sesli sohbet for sharing! I'm in the midst of wedding planning, Camfrog 18 Odalar and both my fiance and I are NOT cake lovers, and can't imagine spending hundreds of dollars on one dessert we don't even like! Forum | Video | Site Map We're planning on doing a buffet of family recipes Sohbet Ruleti, Chat Ruleti pies, cookies, cheesecake, etc - and some of our favorite candies in apothecary jars :) I love to see that
    others are SesliSohbet, Sesli Sohbet thinking out of the [cake] box, too!

    ReplyDelete

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