Friday, May 22, 2009

One of you is lying to me


::Looks at wombat.::

::Looks at sign.::

::Looks back at wombat.::

::Looks back at sign.::

Nooooooooooooooo!!! Which one do I believe? I bet I shouldn't listen to you, Wombat, you fucking sneaky bastard. You probably think just because you look like you want to come hang out and go to a movie and tell me how grateful you are to be out of that pen I'm going to ignore the giant sign right next to you. And yeah, signs have lied to me before. But I know what you wombats are like.

You know what? I'm not even going to let it stress me. All you wombats are the same anyway, bumbling around on stubby legs and burrowing your noses where they don't belong. Fuck you, Wombat, I'm taking my chances with the sign.
at

43 comments:

  1. UnknownMay 22, 2009 at 6:35 AM

    Good call. The sign even has bite marks. Steer clear of the wombat. Sneaky, sneaky bastard.

    ReplyDelete
  2. BarbMay 22, 2009 at 6:52 AM

    It's the use of the word "may" - as in they are *allowed* to.

    The sign isn't a warning, it's a prediction.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMay 22, 2009 at 7:02 AM

    Wombat has some bad-ass claws. I always say, "Never cuddle with animals that could claw you to death."

    ReplyDelete
  4. CherlindreaMay 22, 2009 at 7:03 AM

    BZA, I love you for using the zombies sign in there. You have made my morning.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Laila PMay 22, 2009 at 7:03 AM

    Zombies ahead?! Haha!
    I think you should believe this sign though. That wombat looks about ready to pounce.

    ReplyDelete
  6. WalterMay 22, 2009 at 7:23 AM

    Do it, that wombat totally wants to hang out.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Funny in My MindMay 22, 2009 at 7:35 AM

    Wombat needs a mani-pedi before I do any cuddle time....

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  8. PersonalFailureMay 22, 2009 at 7:39 AM

    and yet, those imploring eyes, that wistful smile . . .

    ReplyDelete
  9. John BosleyMay 22, 2009 at 7:41 AM

    I don't believe it. How could something so cute bite? I think wombats have good PR guys. I mean, really, doesn't that sign just make you more interested in wombats? Wombats are not immune to this recession!

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  10. wombatMay 22, 2009 at 7:58 AM

    Bite? Never! Just come a little closer...

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  11. AnonymousMay 22, 2009 at 8:00 AM

    They can make funny noises....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Elan MorganMay 22, 2009 at 8:31 AM

    This website is being featured on Five Star Friday!
    http://www.fivestarfriday.com/2009/05/five-star-friday-edition-55.html

    ReplyDelete
  13. DHMay 22, 2009 at 8:36 AM

    That sign begs one question in my mind: Just how close are they allowing people to get to those wombats?

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  14. Soda and CandyMay 22, 2009 at 9:08 AM

    Wombats will bite the shit out of you. Go with the sign.

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  15. UnknownMay 22, 2009 at 10:58 AM

    ;)

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  16. BioPeachMay 22, 2009 at 11:35 AM

    I say: bite the wombat before the wombat bites you.

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  17. DHMay 22, 2009 at 11:44 AM

    I tried biting a wombat once. ONCE.

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  18. JaimieMay 22, 2009 at 12:21 PM

    Those pleading eyes and long lashes don't fool me!

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  19. The Peach TartMay 22, 2009 at 3:17 PM

    I just stumbled on your site and love it.

    ReplyDelete
  20. nltismeMay 22, 2009 at 4:51 PM

    Cute but evil!

    ReplyDelete
  21. WR May 22, 2009 at 7:22 PM

    Are all critters from Tasmania f'ing weird or what? It is some small (very tiny small) comfort that those fuckers eat plants and that the claws are for digging. They weigh up to 77 pounds. Dunno, could be a good cuddle but I think I'll pass!

    ReplyDelete
  22. apotheosisMay 22, 2009 at 10:06 PM

    If you can't handle a wombat, how do you expect to play wom?

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  23. Mary SerbeMay 22, 2009 at 11:35 PM

    And why is the wombat imprisoned anyway? Ask yourself if there's a history of incarceration for violent offenses.

    ReplyDelete
  24. KristieMay 23, 2009 at 6:53 AM

    The sign doesn't lie. I was bitten by a wombat when I worked at a zoo.

    ReplyDelete
  25. TheWhacksteRMay 23, 2009 at 9:15 AM

    yeah something in that bugger's eyes tell me he's just a little too content waiting.. good call.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Fragrant LiarMay 24, 2009 at 10:00 AM

    Wombat So Fat, what are you even doing out in daylight? Aren't you nocturnal? Are you trying to fool EVERYONE, including those know-it-all scientists? You really are a sneaky bastard.

    ReplyDelete
  27. GraMay 24, 2009 at 1:14 PM

    Wombat = Speed Bump.

    ReplyDelete
  28. jagsdnkzMay 24, 2009 at 3:22 PM

    caution zombies ahead and they may bite too

    ReplyDelete
  29. JMay 24, 2009 at 9:26 PM

    That sign must be misleading.. Clearly, right?.

    ReplyDelete
  30. UnknownMay 24, 2009 at 9:31 PM

    Wombats have square poop. I never trust anything that can do that

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  31. get in hereMay 25, 2009 at 3:07 PM

    I dated that Wombat once and yes, he was a considerate lover but damn was he a bastard went it came to seeing my family.

    ReplyDelete
  32. LoriSMay 25, 2009 at 8:42 PM

    A wombat bit me, Sept 1997. True story. I'm not sure I have ever recovered.

    ReplyDelete
  33. WilliamMay 25, 2009 at 11:19 PM

    That wombat looks legit. I say cuddle the bastard until it learns to take it.

    ReplyDelete
  34. AnonymousMay 26, 2009 at 6:20 PM

    the lack of real fence-type materials makes one wonder where the sign telling you to "run fast" has gotten to...

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  35. AnonymousMay 26, 2009 at 10:03 PM

    They do bite, I've experienced it - they then quickly burrow away to avoid being held accountable.
    *shakes fist*

    ReplyDelete
  36. Cedric AngMay 27, 2009 at 1:26 AM

    I think you are gonna be safer with me.

    ReplyDelete
  37. AnonymousMay 27, 2009 at 7:08 AM

    I've actually been bitten by a wombat before and it f-ing hurts! Now I always trust signs over cuddly animals.

    ReplyDelete
  38. MaxMay 31, 2009 at 1:24 PM

    You can't trust the wombat because it's from Australia and, as anyone who has ever read or seen 'The Princess Bride' knows, Australia is populated entirely by criminals. Mind you, that could also mean that whoever made the sign was lying. You'd really need to know where the sign was made prior to making an informed decision.

    ReplyDelete
  39. UnknownJune 1, 2009 at 8:14 AM

    A baby wombat bit me once.

    Imagine how cute that thing was...

    ReplyDelete
  40. Serotonin StormJune 2, 2009 at 1:44 PM

    That zombie sign infuriates me. It reminds me of the time I was driving through Utah and saw a sign that said "CAUTION: GIANT CAKE AHEAD DRIVE WITH CARE", well, I got my retractable fork all ready, and 300 miles later, NO CAKE! This leads me to believe that the cake IS, indeed, a lie.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Fuck You, Fuck You, PenguinJune 2, 2009 at 8:52 PM

    http://fyfyp.blogspot.com/2009/06/is-someone-lying-to-fyp.html

    ReplyDelete
  42. NatalieJune 3, 2009 at 1:01 AM

    Even success doesn't tame em. TV Star wombat bit people in the eighties. Goes by the name of Fatso. Watch for him- he ruins TV!

    ReplyDelete
  43. AnonymousSeptember 4, 2009 at 10:58 PM

    not the sign...not the sign....to even remotely trick us wombat you need to chew something 'off camera' or give us 4 wines!

    ReplyDelete

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